Pirate here, just letting you know that me and the ninja painstakingly wasted hours of paid time at work creating the finest paintings, actually MS Paintings...many of which are featured prominently...all the way down the page...on the right...in a column...on this here blog 200% Awesome.
As a side note, ninjas and pirates have often times reported to us that our "art" is particularly emotional, to the point where it has caused many of the following reactions:
* Losing control
* Going into beast mode
* Enjoying dinner at Olive Garden with a loved one
* Watching footage of the NFL Draft on ESPN only to find that the Patriots traded their pick AGAIN and you're NEVER GOING TO SEE YOUR TEAM MAKE A SELECTION
* Single tears
* Writing unanswered fan mail to Chuck Norris
* sipping Diet Mountain Dew out of a wine glass
* chugging a bunch of Gatorade and then practicing dance moves
* meditating at the dojo of your choice
* ordering a spicy chicken sandwich from Wendy's
* taking your pirate ship to Cuba and putting on a rock show for all the babes
Hopefully those of you who faithfully read already have joined our Twitter page by now at http://www.twitter.com/200percent and vice versa, our new twitter friends will now faithfully read this blog (I'm not going to post the address it's right up there). Also I'm calling out all of you artists out there, CREATE NINJA AND PIRATE ART. There are so many starving ninja and pirate artists out there who are starving, and in the case of the ninjas, not scoring with babes AT ALL. I mean, girls only want guys who have great skills. Cmon people. Read a book. Or watch a movie or play a video game.
Scurvily yours,
Surly Blondbeard
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Who sucks more?
THIS GLOSSARY IS AWESOME
- A
- Awesome - everything on here is awesome, many other things are awesome, everything else sucks
- B
- Beast Mode - a spiritual and transcendental state of being, where you start to dominate at levels that cannot be recorded or even predicted. Things that may occur during Beast Mode include: death, destruction, total domination, logs found on top of fax machines, and much much more.
- Blankday - when Blurnsday started to suck (and boy does it ever suck) it was renamed to Blankday. This is getting ridiculous. Anyways, it's probably going to get renamed into something equally as retarded next week. Stay tuned.
- Blurnsday - formerly known as Tuesday, invented by Skippy and named by Archie to deny the existence of Tuesday
- C
- Celular - the name of our most awesome #1 fan.
- D
- Domination - one of the highest forms of winning
- F
- Final Jeopardy - when it's time not to give an answer, but ask the question...used often at 7:54pm on weeknights; sometimes closely related to laughing parties
- H
- Hippies - lamest form of life ever
- L
- Laughing party - Event that takes place when a ninja or pirate dude has an excellent, uh, sense of humor
- N
- Ninja- n., pl. ninja or -jas. A member of a class of 14th-century Japanese mercenary agents who were trained in the martial arts and hired for covert operations such as assassination and sabotage. They are known for their stealthiness and ability to flip out and kill people... besides that, they totally rock out hard, ripping guitar solos so sweet that it causes mass crapping of the pants. Their common enemy is the pirate.
- T
- Tuesday - something that sucks
- Us...a couple of complete morons with computers. otherwise known as a terrible combination.
2 comments:
Some more possible reactions:
-laying log(s) on fax machines at work
-playing AC/DC's "Back and Black" on repeat all day long
-jumping off a mountain
-conquering Cuba simply for its gold and babes
-dissapearing into mid air
-dominance
By the way, Bill Bellicheck is most certainly a ninja, as identified during the draft when he stole all those draft picks from other teams and drafted the most excellent players. Tom Brady is the best example. Oh wait, maybe that makes him a pirate.... I'm confused.
Surly Blondbeard & Ninja Master...you 2 are the funniest people on the interent! When are you going to be taking your act on the road? lol...I think I might have to join Tweeter just to read about what is going on in the Pirate/Ninja 200% Awesome World!
P.S.
Facebook is run by Pirates..they even have the Pirate as a language selection! heehee!
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