What is it? It's actually IT. Which stands for the two coolest things on earth (in the opinion of Napoleon Dynamite, Ninja Master and a bunch of other nerdalingers). Information. Technology. If I got this wrong, stop reading. If I got it right, prepare for hyperspeed because we're about to dig deep into some of the most righteous futuristic really cool stuff plus there's babes like that chick from Heavy Metal in there.
Alright...ready? HYPERSPEEEEEEEED
I work for the coolest company ever and I according to the Chief Master Warlord of Information Technology am the Bread Winner. This is correct. As shown by my fine collection of shirts and trophies and gold and babes. Soon I will have a pirate ship on wheels, also known as a Jeep Cherokee.
Other IT allstars include The Terminator and Joel. The Terminators name is not The Terminator but he sounds like him sometimes. How are ya? Sounds like Who are you? Also, I was telling him how awesome it was to close that big account in Chicago and he kept telling me to sh*t the fuck up and he asked me who my father was and what his profession was.
Joel is not named Joel but he looks like Joel would if Joel lived somewhere other than Joel's old town or Joel's new town. Joel is awesome, he hasn't worked here long but he looks like Joel. I'm gonna teach him to say stuff like Aww Yeah Dude.
Me: Joel whatssss happening
Joel: My name is (censored)
Me: Aww yeah dude!
Joel: Aww yeah dude? Are you retarded sir?
Me: Sweet you totally said aww yeah dude.
END OF STORY.
JOELLLLLL RETURN TO 200% AWESOME PLEEEASEEEEE
Thursday, December 18, 2008
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Who sucks more?
THIS GLOSSARY IS AWESOME
- A
- Awesome - everything on here is awesome, many other things are awesome, everything else sucks
- B
- Beast Mode - a spiritual and transcendental state of being, where you start to dominate at levels that cannot be recorded or even predicted. Things that may occur during Beast Mode include: death, destruction, total domination, logs found on top of fax machines, and much much more.
- Blankday - when Blurnsday started to suck (and boy does it ever suck) it was renamed to Blankday. This is getting ridiculous. Anyways, it's probably going to get renamed into something equally as retarded next week. Stay tuned.
- Blurnsday - formerly known as Tuesday, invented by Skippy and named by Archie to deny the existence of Tuesday
- C
- Celular - the name of our most awesome #1 fan.
- D
- Domination - one of the highest forms of winning
- F
- Final Jeopardy - when it's time not to give an answer, but ask the question...used often at 7:54pm on weeknights; sometimes closely related to laughing parties
- H
- Hippies - lamest form of life ever
- L
- Laughing party - Event that takes place when a ninja or pirate dude has an excellent, uh, sense of humor
- N
- Ninja- n., pl. ninja or -jas. A member of a class of 14th-century Japanese mercenary agents who were trained in the martial arts and hired for covert operations such as assassination and sabotage. They are known for their stealthiness and ability to flip out and kill people... besides that, they totally rock out hard, ripping guitar solos so sweet that it causes mass crapping of the pants. Their common enemy is the pirate.
- T
- Tuesday - something that sucks
- Us...a couple of complete morons with computers. otherwise known as a terrible combination.